The past couple of days have been so relaxing!! I haven’t had much to do lately so I’ve just kind of hung around and cleaned and such. But yesterday I went and hung out with one of my really good friends. As we were hanging out we got to talking about life and all the components that make up a persons life and I realized the importance of knowing what you stand for as an individual. Especially when you go out and are away from the comfort you knew/know.
As I get older I realize the importance of understanding what I believe in personally, whether it’s a moral belief or a spiritual/religious belief that I hold dear, before I graduate from University next semester. Growing up I spent most of my time in Church and it was fun and beautiful, but there came a point in my life when I realized that I needed to choose Jesus and a relationship with my Father for myself because my parents weren’t always going to be there for me; nor will my friends. When I realized I needed to make the decision to believe in Jesus and follow Him for myself, I was going to Church and doing all the things I was meant to do, but I was doing them to please other people and not for myself. I acted like two different people so I could please my friends and my family both, but then I realized when I was a senior in high school that I wanted to please God and I wanted people to see Jesus when they looked at me. I wanted to be firm in my faith and I wanted to learn to trust God more and I wanted to do all of these things to get closer to Jesus for myself. Not because my parents were making me or because I wanted to please the people around me. I started to pursue a relationship with Jesus for myself. I’m going to be honest, there have been times when I doubted a little bit, not because I didn’t believe in God but because I was frustrated that some things in my life were allowed to happen. Those were the times when I yelled at God and when I just let out all of these frustrations. These were also the times when I realized that God never promised life would be easy, and he never promised that being in a relationship with him was going to be easy and I was reminded that I have to know what I believe and why I believe these things.
I think so many times in our lives we as people don’t fully comprehend and understand the depth of what we believe. In the ethics class I took this last semester there was a guy who sat next to me who knew what he stood for, but he didn’t really understand why. So as we sat in class he realized that he had ethics and he had morals he just didn’t fully comprehend what they were. I’m not saying I totally understand what my morals and ethics are, but I do know where they rest and where they were born. I also know that I’m 21 about to be 22 and I’ve still got so much to learn. I have so much to learn about life and love and music and Jesus. I have so much to learn about so many aspects of life, but the things I have learned have impacted me in such a way that I understand that it’s important to hold on the the reasons I believe what I believe.
So many situations form our beliefs and shape our opinions on issues. A lot of times they are going to be different from other peoples opinions and beliefs, and that’s okay. Sometimes I think we feel the need to think like our friends and like the same things our friends like or be interested in the things our family is interested in because we don’t want to be different. I have found that the relationships I have treasured most are the ones where my friends and family don’t like the same things I do. My sisters don’t understand the fancies of my nerdy heart, but I have friends who do. My friends don’t understand they strange way I do certain things, but my family does. My best friend doesn’t understand my love for ugly sweaters nor does she listen to music. Actually, none of my friends or family quite understand my love for ugly Christmas jumpers but that’s okay. We’re not meant to like the same things as one another or believe the same things as one another because if everyone I was friends with understood the strange way I clean things or don’t brush my hair or loved ugly Christmas jumpers as me, I wouldn’t have anyone to challenge and push me. That’s the beauty in relationships. There are going to be people who understand what you like and don’t like and there are people who don’t. In life we have the ability to be pushed out of our comfort zones and think of situations in a different light.
I have found that although my closest friends all love Jesus and we are all part of the same community, I do know a lot of people who do not believe in Jesus and do not believe the same things I do. These are the people who have pushed me to further understand my beliefs. I have found that there is beauty in the fact that my best friend thinks it’s weird that I like ugly Christmas jumpers because I also don’t understand the strange things she likes. I appreciate more that my sisters and I are completely different people with different beliefs, ideas and personalities because they have taught me how to love.
My family, my friends and the people around me have taught me life is hard. They have taught me that nothing comes easy and that nothing in life worth having comes for free; it takes work and dedication. They have also pushed me beyond my limits and so far out of my comfort zone I don’t know what to do but trust God and learn from each situation. From every situation life has thrown my way I have learned to trust God more and I have begun to understand that my life is a series of events that help shape and solidify my beliefs. My beliefs in God, my beliefs in humanity and my beliefs in myself.
Life is a series of learning events that shape us in to the person we are meant to be, whether it be in our current season or the one to come. Life is fun and it is beautiful, but it is also hard and it hurts. When life is fun it’s easy to understand and hold on to our beliefs no matter what they are, because we are not being challenged and we are comfortable. But the heartache and the hardships, the desert places if you will, are the moments in our lives when we learn the most of how firmly we hold on to our beliefs. The hard times challenge us and teach us if we truly stand by what we believe. Some times through the hard times we let go of old ways of thinking and claim new ones, other times we find our footing in our beliefs. Either way we are choosing what to believe and why we believe what we believe. In my life I am grateful for the times when I was pushed by those around me because I began to better understand what I stand for. My reasons for believing what I believe may be different from other people’s, but they are mine and I understand what I stand by and that’s what matters.